Goldfish Rides Again

by Johnny Goldfish, Illustration by Greg Crawford

My riding friend sits with his head cocked to one side like a Labrador Retriever looking at one dusty, winter weary motorcycle waiting to be polished for the rides of summer. My thoughts drift to those great rides to come on every Vermont backroad we can find, (they are all backroads in Vermont, even the Interstates offer great overviews of our gem of a state) and the answer to those thoughts is spring fever has hit. If you have the motorcycle bug in your system or a similar addiction, you understand spring fever.

Late February can find you burning more gas in your car than you spend all summer on your motorcycle because as the fever hits you are visiting every motorcycle dealer in the state while they discount snow machines with the last snow still on the ground. If you don’t own a motorcycle but have the bug, don’t go window shopping because it is like going to see puppies; you always come home with one.

And then you will have to say to your sweetheart, this is really going to be fun for us. Now if your darling says, you’ll never get me on that, the opportunity just arrived for you to say, you know it will keep me out of your hair. You can tell her of all of the healing ointments of spring with its light and warmth and how your soul will mend from winter’s bumps and bruises when you are out riding in the wind. Of course she will immediately, tell you that your full of barn dirt, then when the dust settles your precious will be touched that you shared that winter was hard for you this year, even when she knows you’re a man’s man. Women love sharing but not necessarily the seat behind you on your bike.

Then again you can just go out and buy the motorcycle of your spring-haunted dreams and the alimony payments most likely won’t leave you impecunious (broke). No matter the bike will keep you company and you will feel forever wanted. Your ex will want her checks and the bank will want their payments. Get the misses in on the deal, you’ll feel better eating at the dinner table instead of the barn.

Motorcycling has been called the sport of kings and you may just feel like you own the world when you are hauling tail through the misty mountains of Vermont. However, for many people motorcycles are about more than just the ride and a side note, ladies do ride also, so bikes are not gender specific, although the weight of some behemoths and the height may be a factor in which style of motorcycle you choose. Woman will and can ride big cruisers, sportbikes and play in the dirt. So now mister man you may be purchasing four wheels=his and her motorcycles.

Motorcycles are fun when they are sitting in your garage all winter, when they are sitting in your yard or out by the curb next to other motorcycles because motorcycles beg to be talked about, they call to be polished; leather bags yearn for a softening coat of medicinal oils. In short, motorcycles crave attention.

Some areas of attention for motorcycles that should be checked before climbing on board are good ideas in the spring and every time you go out. The more items you check results in more items to talk about when you and your riding buds are pulled over at your favorite spot.

Check the tire pressure and the amount of rubber and tread, remember you have only two wheels on the ground and if one isn’t working you become a unicyclist with 100 horsepower between your legs. Proper tire inflation is crucial on motorcycles. Every bike maker has spent millions on engineers who study tires and why so much air pressure works with any given tire. Twenty years of schooling says you should believe them and a tire pressure gage could tell you spot-on how much pressure is in your tire. No one can eyeball low tire pressure, which would be like telling the size of a deer by a track in the snow, big tracks do not make big deer. Fifty miles an hour coming into a twisty piece of road is no time to find out that rumbling sound is your under-inflated tire. Got rubber! Get air!

Even kings need safety, so check your lights, do your turn signals work, how about that high beam, are your cluster lights illuminating, you’ll want to see how fast you are going if you happen to be out after dark. When you first start out on that first little ride of the season, test your brakes. They may have picked up a little corrosion while sitting idle in the winter. If you are not personally a wrench, drop by your local dealer and ask for a safety check. A few pesos spent now will be an investment in peace of mind and piece of anatomy. Try to make an appointment because as the weather warms up dealers get overwhelmed with everybody wanting their bike ready yesterday. Check it don’t, wreck it!

Toot your horn, press down on your shocks, check the oil window, how is your chain (if you have one)? Chains wear out about every 15,000 miles and usually require that the sprockets be changed at the same time. Although bikes cost dollars to maintain, it doesn’t have to be all at once and most items are not that expensive when replaced before further damage is allowed to happen. Preventive maintenance is the game if you want to play with royalty. Motorcyclists are very friendly people for the most part, yet it is true enough if you are the guy who always breaks down or your bike needs attention when out for that weekend jaunt, you may find yourself playing easy rider by yourself.

If you plan to ride with a passenger, then you should practice with a passenger. Two-up equals heads-up. A passenger of a motorcycle is known as a co-rider simply because a co-rider shares some of the responsibility for a safe journey. Motorcycles handle completely different when there are two people aboard. The second rider is a second pair of eyes.

Double your fun, double your focus.

Motorcycle saddlebags also affect handling. You are changing the center of gravity every time you add some weight to your bike and you need to make an educated effort to distribute the weight evenly from side to side. Don’t put all of the suds in one bag and your blow-up doll in the other, and it would be a good idea to leave the suds home and who wouldn’t like two blow-up dolls. Oops, I forgot this was going to be printed. I’ll delete that before I send it in.

Have you ever heard of the Motorcycle Safety Foundation (MSF)? They are the guys and gals who work every weekend in the summer either teaching beginners or refining veteran riders on the skills necessary to ride a motorcycle. It is easy to say that you have been riding for thirty years and you know what you are doing, however technology has advanced and new riding techniques and stopping techniques are being taught. Treat yourself to a one day advanced course or if you are a rookie, sign up for the beginner course and at the end of your successful session you will have a license.

Most insurance companies will give you a discount for completing the MSF course. Every course that I had the pleasure to attend always ended meeting new people and every single person that I talked to rode away with some tidbit of information that just might make the difference between a close call or an ambulance call. In Vermont, give the MSF a call at 1-800-529-2535.

One last thought on the checklist for your motorcycle; would you fly on an airplane with someone who skipped the checklist?

What is your favorite color? Motorcyclist often like to think like Henry Ford who said you can have a car in any color you want as long as it is black. While it is true that many riders favor the all black look and more and more cruisers are being introduced with the engine blacked out, or the night theme, think, when you are on a heavily tree-lined road and darkness descends, are you going to blend? Darkness is not the time to blend. There is a bumper sticker going around that says, “Loud pipes save lives.” That may be true, however consider that light travels about 900,000 times faster than sound and if you are wearing something (even reflective tape on your helmet) that is known as hi-viz yellow or orange or red will you be seen before you are heard? Whatever colors you choose, remember CYA, Cover Your Anatomy.

How far do you like to ride? I,000 miles in 24 hours will earn you a pin, but a question begs to be asked. Is your idea of a good time to get there as quick as possible or are you enjoying the ride like Jerry Garcia? How are you ever going to get a girlfriend if you don’t stop? If you drive like hell, you are bound to get there.

It is time to go out and fire the bike up so that you can ride your ride. What does ride your ride mean? Just that, don’t be pulled into the macho fool game of playing keep up or I can go just as fast as you. Track days are for speed. Let your heart be your guide and if the speed for the conditions does not feel right then slow down and ride how you are comfortable. It is your life and you want to live a longtime and discover every twisty, hilly road Vermont has to offer. You can always say your Mother told you to be careful, you don’t want to fall down and leave a mark; mom would hate that.

You have done the work, and you don’t have to tell the spouse you loved doing it, you made your plans, fill ‘er up and keep the rubber on the road and your head above the handlebars. Vermont is yours to discover.

This article has not been approved by Barack, Hillary or John; so using a fairly broad premise and in the hopes of offending at least one person, you can believe this article. Enjoy Vermont!

It’s Boating Season

Nautical Know-How To Fathom

It’s started. People are heading for their lakeside cottages, cleaning up their boats, buying fishing tackle, and thinking about summer life on the water. It’s a great time of year. There are months of good weather ahead and lots of fun to look forward to.

For boaters, the first order of business is to make sure everything’s in working order and safe. The “captain” is responsible for the safety and comfort of all his passengers. This begins with having all the basic safety equipment:

• An approved PFD (Personal Floatation Device - “life preserver”) for every person on the vessel. This is ABSOLUTELY mandatory. This must include properly sized PFD’s for any children aboard.

• All motorized vessels should have a Coast Guard-approved fire extinguisher. If you already have an extinguisher, make sure the gauge shows that it’s in full working order.

• Depending on the size and use of your boat, make sure you have a proper anchor with enough strong, clean line for the depth of water you normally navigate.

• Carry some spare sun block for visitors, along with a basic first aid kit.

For those traveling in larger bodies of water, or in remote locations, it’s wise to have some kind of communications equipment. If you spend time on Lake Champlain or Lake George, you’ll definitely want a VHF radio. This gives you instant contact with the U.S. Coast Guard and other boats in the vicinity. Responsible boaters help each other out, and it’s fairly common to hear a fellow mariner needing some assistance.

Some boaters use CB radios as a substitute for VHF, but it’s very limited. Cell phones have mostly replaced CB’s and are a perfectly good substitute. The only difficulty is missing out on ‘local traffic.’ Besides the safety-oriented chores, with boat ownership there is the other “stuff” that relates to eliminating leaks, keeping the engine running and protecting the finish.

• DON’T skimp on engine maintenance. You’ll regret it if you do. Sitting in the middle of the lake, “dead in the water” after you promised your friends a great ride.... nope.... not a good thing. Have your mechanic test run your engine(s) every year before putting in the water. Have your battery tested (if appropriate), check all fluids and dispose of stagnant fuel in an appropriate recycling place.

• Keep the boat finish clean and waxed. Fiberglass boats generally don’t leak, but they will absorb water as the gelcoat ages. This makes it extremely important to keep the finish waxed and sealed to prolong the life of the boat. Once fiberglass begins to absorb water, the boat becomes increasingly heavy.... and moisture reaches inside to the wooden structural members... causing rot and hull damage. Rot can also be caused by bilge water or leakage around trim pieces where the hull is sectioned together. it’s a good idea to have a look “underneath” after you’ve been in the water for a while and make sure there’s no moisture collecting anywhere.

Enough for the “heavy” stuff. Let’s figure out some new places to go. Here are some of my favorites:

Lake Dunmore - Located just east of Route 7 in Salisbury. Boat launching and parking is available at the State Fishing Access, next to Waterhouses Marina on the west side of the lake. Be VERY careful as you leave the protected cove at the launch ramp. There are rocks very close to the surface for a hundred yards or more as you leave the cove. Dunmore is a beautiful and generally quiet lake sitting under Mooselamoo Mountain. The lake offers great fishing for trout, bass, perch and some enormous pike.

Lake Bomoseen - Located on Route 30 north of Castleton. This is the most “social” body of water in the region. Besides having a lot more casual boat traffic than most other lakes, Bomoseen is home to the The Lake House (a very popular restaurant/pub), a golf course (Prospect Bay C.C.), plus several marinas and boat dealers. Lakeside lodging is available along with a variety of dining establishments. There is a public boat launch and good parking near the “Green Dump” on the west side of the lake.

Chittenden Reservoir - This is most certainly one of the least “social” bodies of water in the region. Most of the land around the lake is owned by the government or the public utility and will never be developed. There are probably less than 10 cottages clustered in a very small area near the dam and spillway. There are no public services of any sort. This also means it’s REALLY quiet and peaceful. Great fishing for trout and perch. Several good picnic sites at various shoreline locations. ASTOUNDING views and lots of wildlife sightings.... deer, moose, waterfowl, etc... The only public access is at the south end of the lake and use is limited to unpowered craft and those powered by very small engines.

Lake Champlain - From our region, accessed most easily from Whitehall, NY or Benson Landing, VT. If you like undisturbed wilderness, put your boat in at Whitehall, NY and follow the narrow and winding south portion of Lake Champlain for the 10+ mile journey to Benson Landing. The water in this area is made to look murky because of the clay soil in and around the lake.... but don’t be scared away. It’s not a swimming and water skiing voyage, it’s a wildlife trip. The area is FULL of awesome birds and animals.... starting with a few cows cooling off in the water just north of Whitehall... and including hawks, turkey vultures, osprey, geese, ducks, deer, heron, egrets and even eagles! There is almost no sign of humans and NO services in this portion of the lake. Bring enough fuel and some lunch.

If you like more open water, put in at Benson Landing where the lake widens out and becomes more clear. Three marinas are located a few miles north of the landing near Chipman Point. You can put it at Buoy 39 Marina and walk up to the fort and display at Mount Independence State Park. Although I’ve never done it, I believe you can also dock at Fort Ticonderoga, on the other side of the lake, and walk up there for a visit as well. Lower Lake Champlain is a beautiful and historic area. Great for boating!

There are, of course, MANY other places to enjoy boating. Getting out to explore is a large part of the fun. Be prepared, be safe, and make sure to bring a good picnic.