Column, Mother's celestial inspirations

Love aspects

By Cal Garrison a.k.a. Mother of the Skye

This week’s Horoscopes are coming out under the light of a Cancer Moon. In the last week or so, all my readings have been filled with questions about true love. It amazes me how all of us keep that flame burning no matter how many times life puts it out.

At the moment, Venus happens to be retrograde and will stay in that groove until June 24. Whether we are aware of it or not, this influence gives us a reason to reconfigure and review what’s going on in the love department.

Everyone has his or her own unique karma in relationships. In a horoscope, Venus and Mars are the main relationship indicators. Aspects to both of these planets, combined with the signs that they occupy, offer clues as to how people are wired in the love department. Lots of other bodies tell tales about that part of our experience too. Whenever I work on a chart, one of the ones that I refer to as a matter of course is the asteroid  ‘Amor.’

The glyph for Amor is a divided heart. This asteroid shows us the gap between the yearning that all of us have for true, unconditional love, and the primary mental/emotional/psychological and physical issues that block the path to its realization. Aspects to Amor yield tons of information about what we do for love. Let’s use this intro to look at some of this. As I go down the list, I am sure you will see pieces of your own story in some of these descriptions:

Amor in aspect to the Moon: This is a connection that brings too much “Mommy” into the relationship dynamic. The shadow of the mother looms in every connection – meaning that whatever was learned from needing or wanting her approval, or whatever was learned from her treatment (mistreatment) during one’s childhood, gets carried into the adult relationships. The need for mothering and/or the need to mother, become conditions in the relationship. This can preclude/eclipse other, more conscious and equal forms of relating. With this aspect there are also huge needs to belong, or to feel that one is part of one big happy family. Whether any of these needs get met, or not, depends on how the Moon/Amor connection is aspected. It doesn’t take much to see that if one is imposing the perfect mother or ideal family template on the partner or home life, forget about it! Whatever they are yearning for will suffocate under the weight.

Amor in aspect to the Sun: With this aspect, there is a deep longing for love from the father. To be unconditionally loved and cherished by Daddy is a huge issue. In personal relationships it sets the individual up to go through hell and high water to please their partner. This MO (modus operandi) is rarely successful because the efforts to please are usually at the expense of the self. I see this aspect in the charts of people whose fathers have died, or whose fathers left the family when the child was young. It’s usually the case that his absence leaves a big crater in the home life, often in the heart of the mother. This builds up a longing in the child for Daddy to return and fill it. As an adult the person with this aspect sees the long awaited dream of the father in every prospective partner.

Amor in aspect to Venus: You see this aspect in the charts of people where money and things become too important in the primary relationship. The object of the individual’s affection has to have money. It’s a gold-digger aspect. When Jerry Hall, (Mick Jagger’s ex) married Rupert Murdoch, a man who is 25 years her senior, Amor and Venus were on the loudspeaker. If Ms. Hall was looking for a fat bank account, Rupert was more than willing to trade his riches for a trophy wife; which gets me to another facet of the Amor-Venus complex. These two bodies cause the native to place a lot of importance on appearances. Looks, body image, and fashion have a lot to say. The pocketbook and the “packaging” are of primary concern, for reasons that often relate to the fact that the individual is insecure, or was raised in a home where everything revolved around money or the lack of it. What shows up when the honeymoon is over turns into a situation where the finances are a constant bone of contention, and the looks, which are always subject to the ravages of time, become the nemesis that is easily traded in for a younger, fresher face.

Amor in aspect to Toro: This connection sets people up to only be attracted to relationships where there is brutalization or rough treatment. Battered women, sadists, masochists, and/or anyone who winds up in a relationship where there is physical, mental, verbal, or emotional abuse are bound to have this aspect in their chart. In a simpler form, it shows up when you see someone who is only attracted to rough, crude, blue collar types.

Amor in aspect to Lilith: Lilith is the infidelity asteroid. When Amor aspects Lilith you find people who have a hard time remaining faithful. When Amor and Lilith intertwine part of the lesson can involve realizing that it is possible to love more than one person, and that when they wind up in an extracurricular affair, loving one doesn’t mean that they love the other, any less.

Amor in aspect to Siva (Siwa/Shiva): When Amor and Siva aspect each other, the love life becomes a place where the individual gets nailed to the proverbial cross; Siva is The Great Destroyer after all. If these people enter into a relationship with the idea that true love will be the answer to their prayers, it turns out that the experience brings them to their knees, one way or another. Relationships are where they get to fall apart, and love becomes the means by which they come to a deeper understanding of themselves — through the back door. Life with a Siva/Amor aspect would be easier if somewhere along the line someone would tell us that the “Tunnel of Love” is a place where many of us come undone. If the individual is unable to take a broader view, they feel victimized by the intensity of it all and become embittered by their experience.

Amor in aspect to Psyche: Here, for some strange reason, love equates with damage. This means that the individual can’t set boundaries, and the inability/refusal to draw the line invites experiences that create a lot of internal damage. Vulnerability and a willingness to bring the notion of psychological pain and psychic damage into the love life becomes a requirement; i.e.  it’s not love if it doesn’t hurt, or require a huge amount of intense soul searching. What’s interesting is that the potential for damage, and/or high levels of psychological intensity serve as a lure, and become the main point of attraction to others.

There are thousands of asteroids. Amor can be paired with all of them. What adds to the complication is the idea that all of us have been brainwashed into believing that love is a simple matter of watching, waiting, until the knight in shining armor or the fairy princess shows up. The gap between the fantasy and the internal issues that are running the show is enormous.

People ask me all the time: “Will it be this way for the rest of my life?” My answer? “It will be that way for as long as it takes you to get to the bottom of what runs you from within; sometimes it takes forever.” Let me leave you with that, and invite you to take what you can from this week’s ‘scopes.

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